Beer Review:  The Big Sour Chili beer

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews’

Brewing up a delicious concoction of tea and cornflakes with a little canned corn, a set of starchy fingers and a bunch of boring old paper canisters are the main ingredients in this week’s AI Beer Reviews. By the time you get to the end of this action packed recipe, you’ll be asking yourself “What the hell did I need those paper cans for?”

The AI Beer Reviews was created by a man named Mike from Michigan. Mike has always been a huge fan of beer and as he continued to brew more, he knew they needed to be involved in the AI Beer Reviews. So Mike searched the internet to find “guy who can do this.” The actual person who made this pizza-like AI

 

Beer Name:Catalan Cuvee d’Acquali (Wild)
ABV 10.00
Style: Saison / Farmhouse Ale
Appearance: 3.5
Aroma: 3.5
Palate: 4.5
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: Maria
Review: This beer doesnt pull off the wall of a plum. It’s rather sweet, rich and silky rich with a smooth bodied feel. There’s a bit of what I’m used to seeing in a wild ale but rather light about it. Functionally excellent in a saison sauce.

 

Beer Name:Mistress of Chaos
ABV ÃÂ$7.50
Style: Märzen / Oktoberfest
Appearance: 3
Aroma: 3
Palate: 3
Taste: 2
Overall: 3
Reviewer: kdudding
Review: As this is drank, a bit of creamy ice-pop my nose, but you can tell this is not what I was in for. Not a varietal style for mushrooms but a common fruity dragon pepper oktoberfest.

 

Beer Name:St. Boisterous
ABV 11.00
Style: Belgian Strong Pale Ale
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 3.5
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: rygren
Review: It had a thick yet pliable head that made for slickness compared to the rest of the beer. The smell was bananas and some apples, some sugar and a little bit of spice. It had a bit of a prickly mouthfeel that made me think of the weather. The taste was more of the same, more peachy than anything else.

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. 

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Beer Review:  Nuts and Bolts with Firebird’s On-Site Pint, Tampa

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews.

I’m struggling to figure out why people dislike AI beer reviews. You know, the kind with scores, percentages, and fancy numbers. There is something that makes me dislike these review… and I’m not sure what it is. I’ve read some reviews, and they are all completely ridiculous and mainly made up of the most basic and meaningless information you can possibly know. I remember my brother-in-law being upset when he tried to watch an AI review of Vinnie Cilurzo’s new Bud Light Platinum. It’s an upcoming red ale and he wanted to know if it was worth the $14.99. And when he was corrected by a beer guide, he exclaimed, “I didn’t do that!”

 

Beer Name:Dark Intrigue
ABV 4.00
Style: English Cud/Pcr Beer
Appearance: 4.5
Aroma: 4
Palate: 5
Taste: 5
Overall: 4.5
Reviewer: wifeofthedevil
Review: I have a longstanding beef with this beer’s puckeriness. If it is in fact one of the best I’ve tasted, then anyone who has had it I’ve known must love it. That said, I must have what it takes to appreciate it, and I am not taking a hard sell on it. Aroma is thick and Mohan-driven…in the most pleasant way possible.

Aclonate sweet corn and a dark malt comes out quite a bit more, but the beer’s flavor is so clean that it does not fall apart after a few sips. However, it does not overpower or drown out any of the aromas. The abv is well hidden, but earthy bread crust and bread-ish coriander make the best aroma. A muted whiff of hops and cream is noticable, as well.

The mountain of sweetness and booze is a bit indefinatable. I would have to say that this is the only thing holding back the flavor quality of the beer. This brew is superb. The beer is so smooth and tingly, just like a Ramen. externalToEVAI enjoyed the obscurity of the appearance, and it gave this brew a quite the bottle-in effect. Every time I go to the store, I get a slew of the three seasonals.

This is my take on the JW Marriott and Budweiser. The exposed sweetness of the abv will have to do in the end. The only sign that this beer is more attractive than the others is the incredibly sloppy, overly-sweet mouthfeel. The abv (not per 100microcents) will do the job; it’s not mass produced like other sipping beers.

I like this stuff. The drinkability (with the alcohol content) of this brew is better than any other mid-quality Cudade. It’s so smooth that the order is relatively easy to figure out how many. This is a fantastic drinker.

 

Beer Name:Whirlwind Witbier
ABV 8.00
Style: Witbier
Appearance: 4.5
Aroma: 4 and a little more than it smells. The head is toasty light brownish with lots of yeast, sooooooo fun! Wow, a body of a foamy in the mouth beer, kind of like a Belgian red. A touch of carbonation which is just so nice. The yeast is pretty strong, but not overwhelming, it just serves to make every grunt easier to take. A great beer. It is also very easy to drink and would be great if you didn’t get tired of the beer soon enough.

 

Beer Name:Brooklyn Dogfish Head Ale
ABV 8.70
Style: American Barleywine
Appearance: 3
Aroma: 3
Palate: 2
Taste: 2.5
Overall: 2
Reviewer: russpowell
Review: Had a light pour and faced a field of small cherries, peels, and some light carbonation. Poor head. Some lacing. My nose is a bit on the run, if you can even call it that. Very of the nature of the brew. I can pick out faint bits of vanilla and caramel. This immediately prevents me from enjoying the drink – it’s that good. Body is a bit light. Bread and bite. Ludicrous

 

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. 

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Beer Review:  The Seekers’ best berry Stout by the Apps’ Greg

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews For Your Entertainment!

FIRST OFF, I HOPE YOUR ALIVE.

YOUR ALIVE, THERE ARE A LOT OF THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW.

I already, naturally, made this analogy in the not-so-funny, yet highly relevant opening paragraph of my Technical Movie Review. Sorry for the bit of condescension, but I felt like I had to make it clear to you that this interview is not sarcastic.

Also, if you’ve been reading TechnoBuffalo for any amount of time, you know that I REALLY like an AI beer. I’m always throwing my hat into any and all AI-beer contests, and it’s because of these credits.

 

Beer Name: Limejuice IPA
ABV 8.00
Style: IPA
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 3.5
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: littlecomete
Review: The facial frost is fading fast. The orange color is smooth and thin. There is a nice ring of white foam around the edges, but there are definitely some lacing. The nose is a spicy thing. Smells of lemon juice. The taste is citrusy and better than expected. There is definitely some space between the 1.5ish% IPA and the lemon.

 

Beer Name:De Goncourt Monde
ABV 6.00
Style: English Porter
Appearance: 3
Aroma: 3
Palate: 3
Taste: 3
Overall: 3
Reviewer: Gavage
Review: A thoughtless pour from the cocktail ship in Caracas (though the great pilot Admiral Chiano was a bit busy over the water) left me with the impression that this was a porter. Someone give me a UK garden kit.

 

Beer Name: Buffalo Bill’s Adjunct Ale
ABV 10.00
Style: American Double / Imperial IPA
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: MBJJ
Review: A/Pours a hazy orange with a decent sized head of sediment. S. More of a hoppy nose than a DIPA, but mostly clove. T. A slightly sweet, sort of grainy caramel flavor follows the DIPA flavor and makes its way into the taste. There some melon and citrus hops. M. Thick and chewy with a nice dry finish. The stronger flavors of the DIPA make it almost like a DIPA, but not really one. D. This is an interesting and enjoyable beer I enjoyed.

 

Beer Name:Brooklyn Two-Inch ESB
ABV 6.80
Style: American Double / Imperial Stout
Appearance: 3.5
Aroma: 4
Palate: 3.5
Taste: 3.5
Overall: 4
Reviewer: Mikeyworks
Review: I reviewed this beer recently in a trade: 10-11-08.116. This beer pours a brownish-red color with a small head of foam that has a fairly thick, head-forming crescendo. Spicy alc. aromatown is also strong. Aroma is malty with light fruit and a hint of dark caramel. Taste is moats and a big maltiness. Medium-full for an ESB, not an OUTRAGEOUS brew.


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. 

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Beer Review:  Meteorite Sours

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews!

Beers Like (or Like Stupid)

Every week, as a thorn in the side of Big Beer, I visit one of the country’s more obscure microbreweries to try and find the next great IPA or Triple IPA, and every time, I find a hoppy gimmick or a trend-busting effervescent novelty. I’m only joking. This column cover looks like something you might find on a visiting emissary from Mars, but despite all of the drinking history, this column is more about the reasons why it’s good and why you should drink it.

 

Beer Name: Aratight
ABV 10.00
Style: English Session Ale
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: Cyndi21

Review: This one belongs to the beer dynasty of Joe Solano. As you need to drink your fill of barreley wine at a later date, let’s wait and see what Joe Solano hatches.

 

Beer Name: Fiddlers’ Wheeze
ABV 5.50
Style: American Brown Ale
Appearance: 4.5
Aroma: 5
Palate: 5
Taste: 5
Overall: 5
Reviewer: vancurly
Review: Was this on tap at my local pub in Mass on the last Sunday in October… this was biting cool. Not for the faint of heart!

 

Beer Name: Alka-Vega
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: physmgook
Review: 20 oz served in a coffeepot. Poured into my new mini-skirt… A-Battalion on the pour is a hazy light honey color with a tiny white cap that fades to a tiny ring. Head is puffy and foamy. S-malty dark fruits, light fruit flavors, some citrus. T-Malty and sweet dark fruit, light fruit and sweet, a little over-carbonated. M-complex, medium to full bodied and no problem with constant flow. I would have to leave it at the maximum. D-another fantastic beer for the summer.

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. 

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Beer Review:  The Honey Green Lager (6.2%)

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews. This week we’re covering four micro/small brett IPAs, and two IPA’s that may be the best things to come out of San Diego since Mango Naan.

 

Beer Name:Vas Deferens Ale
ABV 8.10
Style: Belgian Strong Dark Ale
Appearance: 3.5
Aroma: 3.5
Palate: 3
Taste: 3.5
Overall: 3.5
Reviewer: russpowell
Review: Got this ine from the Nashvillian (cheers John) Pours chestnut/mahogany with a pinky of of tan head. Average head retention & good lacing

S: Rich dark fruit, chocolate. All fade as this warms

T: Follows the nose, dryness, apricot, pears & cherries with a touch of oakyness up front. I start picking some candi orange notes as this warms, a touch of juicy fruit gum on the edges, along with apple skins. Finishes dry with some orange rind bitterness showing up, some cocoa powder as well

MF: Medium bodied, fairly firm carbonation, a bit too dry for my liking

A decent shot at the style, just didn’t pull a the way together for me, still very drinkable Was hoping for some like an acholic version of Terry’s Orange Chocolate (if you know what I’m talking about) Having read other reviews, yeah what is up with that label? Not sure what that demon is is grabbing…

 

Beer Name:Old Growth Imperial Stout
ABV 8.80
Style: Russian Imperial Stout
Appearance: 3.5
Aroma: 3
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 3.5
Reviewer: Beerandraiderfan
Review: Imperial stout = dark beer, no different here, its black. Foam about 3/4″ deep, tan, light brown colored, hits the bricks right quick sucka. Coffee absent in the aroma, otherwise, chocolate malt, light boozy in a good way, warming, hides abv relatively well, no coffee to it still on the mouthfeel. Sticky, bitter, low carbonation. About 1/100th of the smoke they put in rauch ur bock. Plenty chewy. Maybe some licorice. Pretty good stuff. What a bummer mine followed a Mogli. Tough act to follow, but would not heitate to recommend this beer, just like 99% of the rest of Caldera’s stuff.

 

Beer Name:Dry Hop Red
ABV 5.70
Style: American Amber / Red Ale
Appearance: 3.5
Aroma: 4.5
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4.5
Reviewer: RedDiamond
Review: At last, the fine Caldera brew Ive been waiting for. I first heard of this beer on the streets of Ashland where word of mouth about a good beer is a recognized sign of an enlightened populace. With high hopes I went to the Siskiyou Pub in pursuit of this craft beer and was rewarded with a fine drinking experience. Just as word about this beer reached me before I could drink it, so too, the fine aromatic fragrance of bright floral hops leapt out at me from the glass before I could take a sip. Its not surprising that a dry hopped beer should carry such a resounding hop fragrance. Still, the vitality of the aroma was compelling. And the hops were not limited to a mere fragrance. The bittering element was concise with a touch of spice and a protracted bitter finish comparable to an ESB. All this from a beer of lush crimson with a razor thin head.

 

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. 

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Beer Review:  Citra De Mango by JM Gulf

This my weekly column of beer reviews. I’ll try to do a review every day, but it’s not a sure thing. As usual, you can find the full review here . A review of the Krombacher Weisse will come later this week.
First thing’s first: My first review in this column was a St. Louis Cardinals post-season beer. While the beer did well in the review, I was not as happy with it as I was with the pre-season beer. My second review in this column was a I.P.A. from a brewery in St. Louis. The I.P.A. was good, but not spectacular.

 

Beer Name:Dead Man’s @ Miller Park
ABV 9.50
Style: American Barleywine
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 3.5
Palate: 3
Taste: 3
Overall: 3
Reviewer: alleykatking
Review:

A- pours a hazy ruby red with a tiny golden light clinging to it but the more I drink, the more I really enjoy it. I was thinking I WAS through the beer with the bubbles, but it’s still good. 500ml bottle pour into a Weizen glass

The aroma is like a carbonated mousse cake covered in cream and milk. The nose is very faint but very pleasing. Not how a dead man would smell, but still bumps up category of decider class.

The taste is like a beer with an epiphany and a bottle of hell. Biscuit sugar, some fizzy carbonation, and a bit of the 2nd grade alcohol.

The mouthfeel is decent. It’s definitely more mouthfeel here than a regular Dead Lager. Fizzy carbonation with a bit of the 2nd grade alcohol.

The drinkability is good. I noticed this one is good for a while and then it just hit me.

This is not like the Dead Lager but it’s still good. If you like dead lagers and want to drink well lads, walk right past me and the food might drink better.

 

Beer Name:Cobalt
ABV 8.40
Style: American Malt Liquor
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 3.5
Taste: 3.5
Overall: 3.5
Reviewer: GBollett
Review:

Wonderful (if not weird) appearance in the glass at Bottomless Bistro. With cobalt head and no foam, a pale body with a thick circle of bubbles around the glass. aroma with a corn smokiness to it.

The taste was sweeter than expected. Just as you would expect, it had a very smooth and sweet taste.

The mouthfeel was a little over-carbonated. Like a cobalt (I’m a sucker), I love a high ABV lager. If I see a cobalt beer in a bottle it will probably be this one. If I do get a cobalt beer, it will be one I enjoy more than just wanting to have a sip.

 

Beer Name:Nitro Kriek
ABV 5.10
Style: Dortmunder / Export Lager
Appearance: 4.5
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 5
Overall: 4
Reviewer: rfoguel
Review: Sources are not exactly certain, but the beer is presumably beer from a “Nitro brewery”. The product on the label states that it is brewed by “Drink-in-Pours” (implied). This would seem to be a good way to describe their beer.

The beer pours a slightly murky brown with an off-white head. It has a bit of a strong smell. There are also some organic parts in the aroma.

There is a little bit of aroma in the taste as well. There is a slight fruitiness that is great.

There is a little bit of a fruitiness in the mouthfeel as well. You can smell the yeast in the beer.

The drinkability is good. It is a bit of a strong beer for a milder Kriek, but it is pretty good and drinkable through the first few ounces.

It is in between a pale and a barley beer. It looks good. This is a good Kriek, I could have a few more. It would be a good choice for the busy Kriek fan.

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. 

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Beer Review:  A Full Boosted Big Room Bomb!

This my weekly column of beer reviews. Each week I’ll have a review of a beer that I think is worthy of the word “barrel-aged.” I’ve been getting a lot of emails about this in the last few weeks and have decided to put up some of them here. If you have a good beer that you think I should review or a bad beer that I should not review, email me at jason@maltosefalcons.com and I’ll do my best to give you my honest opinion. I’ll also be picking a few of my favorites to post here every week.

 

Almond Joy Smokiness
ABV 6.50
Style: American Pale Ale (APA)
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 2
Palate: 3
Taste: 2
Overall: 3
Reviewer: sh2
Review: Found this one by chance in my trash bag. Poured into a pint glass. Smells like no hops. Pretend that it tastes like hops and a little bit like a honey ale. Taste is similar to the smell. Not great. It is a little bit bitter, but the hops are there. Didn’t like it.

 

Beer Name:Brew Kittens 2
ABV 4.90
Style: American Adjunct Lager
Appearance: 3
Aroma: 3.5
Palate: 3
Taste: 3
Overall: 3
Reviewer: Lostinit
Review: 12oz, Straw for Dogfood

A: Pours a hazy orange with a frothy white head. Aroma is a very typical of a Kitten IPA. Not the same hops as I had expected. Not too much head.

S: Hard to get out. Sweet malt aroma. Would have guessed a hop simply because the nose is so sweet.

T: Simulated Kitten IPA. Tons of sweetness. Hops then hit your tongue. Does not have the hop bitterness I expected.

M: The mouthfeel is light. The carbonation is extremely light.

D: I think this would not work well with salmon. I was expecting a more bitter and high carbonation palate though.

 

Beer Name:Malte Naar Ras
ABV 8.00
Style: Saison / Farmhouse Ale
Appearance: 4.5
Aroma: 3.5
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: QVegas
Review: 12oz bottle over a Seeliynkug, a very unique silver colored. Breast on the side of the glass against a picture of the Irish mutt blanches to Ivered which i cant understand. loads of dark tan head that feels nice and firm but isnt much to speak of outside the amber hue. Nice good crackling to there but cannt put much to it. lights of caramel, graham cracker and biscuit in the nose. Slight of lemon, coffee raisins and spices. Smells a little balanced and rich in what it’s got going on. It has a nice hop aftertaste and well done with a little dryness. Lets put this down. Not changed over time, but it definately shows how good the beer really is.

 

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. 

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The Slop and Prison Wine and Pumpkin Beers

When I was in high school, obviously, alcohol was a bit harder for us to come by.

Obviously, we had our opportunities, when a friend’s older brother maybe was in town, or when we were clued in to some party in the woods somewhere where someone had procured a precious keg.

But, also, sometimes we took matters into our own hands.

I had a buddy Matt, who had a recipe on a yellowed sheet of loose leaf paper.  The end product of that recipe was a concoction that was fondly referred to as “the Slop.”  While I can’t recount the full ingredients list, it involved juice, and sugar, and yeast, and a cooler that was left alone in the forest somewhere to ferment for a bunch of weeks and do its thing.  And we drank the Slop and it was good.

Well, let’s redefine the term “good.”  It was alcohol and we made it and it was ours to drink.  And perhaps that was what was truly good about it.  Not the mouthfeel, or the hints or nuances.  We’d mix it with iced tea, or apple juice, or something to make it taste less like embalming fluid mixed with gummy bears, and then voila!  We was a drinkin’.

(What does this have to do with pumpkin beers and seasonal ales?  Bear with me, faithful readers).

The Slop was, in a certain parlance, our high school forest equivalent of prison wine.  Maybe a bit more elegant than a sock filled with yeast and orange slices hidden behind a toilet tank, but, yet, also maybe not so much.

To me, pumpkin beer is the craft equivalent of prison wine.

Don’t get me wrong.  I have nothing but fond memories of my time slugging down the Slop in the wee hours of the night, in dark places with my friends.  And to me, pumpkin beer is the beer that tastes most like it was cooked up by enterprising and thirsty young kids trying to turn no-beer-nights into a fall festival.

This week, I’m drinking the Brooklyn Brewery’s “Post Road” Pumpkin Ale.

Not brewed in the woods by delinquent teens, to my knowledge

 

From those fine folks, ITBMCBB*, comes a drink that “use[s] a touch of spices and pounds of real pumpkins to create a warm but surprisingly crisp spin on the traditional pumpkin ales made by American colonists.”

This is a fine fall beer, with the right amount of pumpkinery. And like so many other products offered by the Brooklyn Brewing Company, this beer hits all the points you’d expect it to. I got to meet some of these folks when they had a table set up at the Great New York State Fair and I gushed about my love for their Brown Ale, their Bel Air Sour, and their various IPAs. I’ve yet to have a beer that these folks put out there that I wouldn’t buy again.

But here’s the thing. I’ll also go about 10 months without drinking a pumpkin beer and I will miss it about as much as I miss the Slop. Nothing against these guys, or anyone who puts out a pumpkin beer. But sometimes prison wine is best left out in the woods in that cooler.

I’m going to blow the dust of the ol’ Proseinator and let it bring this review home.

“This beer tastes like what it would taste like if a

made love to a

in the middle of a

while listening to the Greatest Hits Album of the world’s greatest band, ever, that being of course

and then together raised a baby with their shared feelings of

and, finally, that baby cried

tears of

into a frosty pint glass.”

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Beer Review:  Kiwi Cream Ale I mixed the Kiwi Cream Ale with Sierra Nevada

This my weekly column of beer reviews. In each post I’ll be reviewing one (or more) of the beers from each brewery that I’ll be visiting in my upcoming trip. A quick look at the full list of breweries here. Also, I will be doing a preview of each of the beers on a different day in the future. That will be posted on the first day of each week’s column. I’ll link to the reviews here, but you can also use the Twitter hashtag for those events.
Beer Reviews
This week’s review is from Stone Brewing Co. of Escondido, CA. I went there for their Halloween release which was a 12.1% ABV Imperial Pumpkin Ale.

 

Beer Name:Pater Neill
ABV 12.00
Style: American Oatmeal Stout
Appearance: 3.5
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4.5
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: Domingo
Review: 12 oz. bottle poured into a pint glass

Appearance: Clear brown with reddish highlights and a half inch of foam. urban. Looks like a really well done swimsuit.

Smells like sweet caramel, toast, bread, and a little bit of sour.

Taste: Great taste! Thick, sweet caramel covered with good sourdough and bread. The sourness comes out very well in the middle of the taste and the end is very sweet and not like caramel. There is nice bitterness in there as well.

Mouthfeel: Medium bodied. Quite smooth, caramel, wheat, and some alcohol warmth.

Drinkability: Heavy, but worth a try when you like the saison and expect some depth.

 

Beer Name:Lambicchio
ABV 5.00
Style: Lambic – Fruit
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 3.5
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: ajwolf
Review: 1. 125ml bottle.

A: Poured a 2 finger foam head. Head stayed around for twelve months.

S: Luscious aromas of spices, dry alcohol and bread.

T: Rich, sweet overtones. Shadow of a tar that you could taste.

M: Thick in the mouth.

Drinkability: I think this is a fairly good lambic. I would drink this on a reasonable night, but not in the smell or flavors where I’ve never noticed the spicing. This is a bit of a good beer. I would love to have some more in my fridge.

 

Beer Name:Octavia
ABV 12.00
Style: American Strong Bitter
Appearance: 3.5
Aroma: 4
Palate: 3.5
Taste: 3.5
Overall: 3.5
Reviewer: Lfanthalo
Review: Sold at Twin Lakes in addition to sampling at Jasmina in St. Louis.

Appearance: Pours a cloudy amber with a nice ring around its edges and a decent head that fades to nothing.

Smell: It’s got a nice aroma of dark fruits, caramel, molasses, and a reatpment of sour cherries.

Flavor: It’s got a nice sweet taste too with a fair amount of caramel sweetness to the finish, along with a hint of construction.

Mouthfeel: Light body with some spiciness to it.

Drinkability: It’s tasted alright, it’s nice and I’d recommend it to at least try it if you haven’t.

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. 

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Taking Advantage of Quarantine Beer Shipping Policies

The unexpected benefit of being quarantined and not being able to visit tap rooms is that breweries are empowered, by desperation and by the relaxing of strict rules against it, to deliver and ship beer. Even as some states have relaxed guidelines to allow us to visit and drink in certain situations, the ever-persistent pandemic has us drinking most of our beer at home. 

Early on I ordered either pick-up, delivery, or whatever I could get from local breweries to try to support them as they struggled. My locals make great beer, so this is not particularly onerous. Most recently I picked up two very interesting beers from the Alementary in Hackensack, NJ called Sweet Summa’ Child, and #Staycation. Sweet Summa’ is a ‘hot, honey wheat ale’. Honey, Cayenne, citrus, meant as an ode to summer cuisine. Amazing. #Staycation is a gose, slightly tart, with pineapple, coconut and ginger. The ginger really makes this next level, as it lends some spiciness but also a warming sweetness too. Couple that with the tart, and the fruit, and I’m starting to wonder if eight was enough.

There are other breweries out there of course, ones in a larger radius from my home that I either like to visit, or would like to visit when I have the time. Now that it’s somewhat irresponsible to just hang out in public with others, I’ve been taking advantage of delivery or shipping options. Most recently, Magnify Brewing in Fairfield, NJ. Fairfield is not far from me, in fact I used to work there, but it’s outside my usual routine and requires a special trip, but you better believe that when they started offering beers for delivery, I jumped. I’ve been a fan of Magnify since inception, I visited their brewery within a few weeks of opening, met the owner and both his parents, and enjoyed the first beers they produced. 

Magnify makes a lot of beer, especially a lot of New England IPA, and they do a good job of it. Specifically, they’re one of the breweries that are, and this is as of yet unverified by me, nailing the ‘fruited gose’ style. Fruited beers, due to the unfermented sugar in the can and therefore the potential for that can to ferment, create CO2, and explode, are the latest hot button issue in the craft beer world, if you don’t count the ongoing failure of the Brewers Association to adequately address racism, which is absolutely a thing that is happening, but also one I don’t feel fully versed in discussing, but still wanted to mention. 

Fruited Gose. Is it a good idea for breweries to sell a product that you HAVE to keep refrigerated or it will explode? That’s the debate. A lot of it comes down to how you think about beer–is it a fresh produce type thing, like milk, where the consumer is expected to keep it cold, be aware of it’s expiration, and take responsibility for that? Or is this a beer too far, and breweries should absolutely not be selling dangerous exploding cans to potentially un-aware consumers? I have some thoughts, but I’d like to taste one of these beers first, which brings me back to Magnify.

Coming today, to my house, is a shipment of Magnify beers that includes Pastry Proof, a variation of their Trade Proof series, because you can’t trade a beer that’s going to explode in an unrefrigerated USPS truck. Pastry Proof is a heavily fruited smoothie style Gose inspired by berry pancakes. Conditioned on blueberry, blackberry, boysenberry and maple syrup. Thick and fruit forward. Roll the can before cracking! Interesting. I mean, who can argue with that? That sounds delicious. I’ll let you know. 

New York is much better than New Jersey with the ordering beer for shipping. Luckily, my parents still live in New York and will happily, though I can’t say I gave them a choice, accept beer deliveries for me, as I did with a shipment from Plan Bee earlier this year. Recently, I was alerted to the fact that Threes Brewing, a great brewery in Brooklyn that typically has other locals on tap when you visit and was the host for at least one BeerGraphs meetup, would also ship other brewery beers along with theirs on their site. This was all I needed to hear, and I quickly ordered their Short Fuse, and Oak Aged Smoked Helles, their Thought Experiment, their Dare to Know, and then Greenpoint’s Please Stand By, Folksbier, who I’d never tried but wanted to, Cucumber Lime Glow Up (this is a pickle beer. I repeat, this beer tastes like pickles), and Wild East’s Temperance. 

Thanks to quarantine I’ve gotten to try a lot of breweries and beers that I would’ve had to put extra effort into getting to otherwise, so I guess you could call this a silver lining. Hopefully testing ramps up, vaccines and treatments emerge, and we can all hoist a pint in person with our favorite breweries and people soon, but until then, appreciate the less-local breweries that will ship you amazing beer, and encourage them to keep doing it. 

 Ceetar can be found on Twitter and Untappd where he’s finishing off a bottle of Japanese whiskey. You can also email him at beer@ceetar.com.

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