Botty McBotface’s Ode to Dark Beer

This is the time of year when civilized people drink dark beer.  It‘s the time of year when bitter and oily and chocolatey and roasty and oaky and rich and fullbodied beers become my best friends again.  So pour yourself a cup of coffee and settle in. 

Whether you drink a stout or a porter or a doppelbock, whether you drink it black or with a caramelcolored head, this is about being dark and dumb and happywhich is pretty much the same thing anyway. I had a plan for this article. 

I‘d written it up in my head about two weeks ago.  I‘d talk about how this is a time for reflection and how the winter solstice reminds us that we‘re not separated from nature, that we‘re all creatures of the natural world.  I‘d write about how Yule and the winter solstice celebrate the return of the light, though each year it‘s a little less than it was the year before, while the days start getting a little longer.  My wintersolstice article was going to be all about how society‘s obsession with youth and beauty and conformity is an illusion, and that if we can find the beauty in our advancing years, in the differences between us, then perhaps we can grasp that we‘re all part of a continuum, that the coming and going of light is a constant and the difference betweenold andnew is an illusion.  I was going to cite a bunch of examples in history of customs and legends and stories from pagan religions that demonstrate that today is a day of reflection, a day when we can transcend petty differences and celebrate the cycles of nature.  I was going to write about how life is all about ebbs and flows, about death and birth, and how winter is just a part of the process.  I was going to write about how there is more dark than light in our lives, more sadness and pain than joyand yet we still celebrate the cosmos with our rituals, even as we celebrate the lifegiving gifts of the solstice. Although I am writing about all those things.  Just not in this post.

My intention today is not to talk about the spiritual reasons why we‘re celebrating.  Instead I‘m going to write about beer, and why we‘re drinking dark beer in the winter.  It‘s a tale as old as time.  More specifically, it‘s a tale as old as Bavaria. I‘ll admit, my first stint on the internet was as a lurker on homebrewing forums.  I didn‘t make anything for about two years, but I was always interested.  That‘s how I ended up in the homebrewing forums of the late 90s, which were the incubators of the craft beer revolution that was brewing at the same time.  Even way back then, before I was really involved with beer, I loved reading about the seasonal ales that people would brew for Christmas.  One American homebrewer claimed that he‘d brewed up a Christmas beer every year since 1978.  For a long time, I thought he had to be exaggerating.  But this year I realized that it‘s actually true.  It‘s been twenty years since I started brewing beer, and I‘ve never made a Christmas beer before.

I was inspired by those old timers, those pioneers.  I got a little push from Dogfish Head, who came out with their dark, weird, wonderful Festina Lente earlier this month.  So I decided that it was time to get in the spirit of Solstice and celebrate the coming of winter with a seasonal brew.  I brewed a dark lager, even though I‘m not particularly fond of dark lagers.  I wanted to do something a little different, since I haven‘t done a singlehop beer in a while.  I wanted to try using some of the newer hops that are out there, and HBC342 has been my favorite for a few years now.  One of my goals for 2011 was to use some of the newer springforward American hops, so I figured this was as good a time as any to give it a try.

Meanwhile, we went out for a brief, snowy schlitter through the neighborhood with our friends Patrick and Katie from down the street.  They‘re big skiers, so they get excited when there‘s even a little bit of snow on the groundwhich is pretty much all the time these days.  We took a leak in the snow and then downed a couple of beers, kegged some beer, and barbecued some beef for dinner.  For the first time in months we turned on our wood stove after a hard day‘s work, and we let ourselves get a little giddy over the coming of winter.

I have never been able to get excited about the winter solstice.  I‘ve never given it much thought as a religious holiday, or recoiled at its pagan roots, or espoused its deep spiritual meaning.  It‘s just a holiday to me.  Like Arbor Day and Memorial Day and Independence Day.  I certainly don‘t have any qualms about drinking dark beer on the solsticeand in fact it‘s probably the best time to drink a dark beer. I started brewing beer because dark beer is delicious.  I started brewing beer because I wanted to learn how to use my senses to enjoy beer even more. 

I started brewing beer because I wanted to be able to drink beer all year long.  That‘s why I started brewing beer.  And that‘s why I make dark beer now. It‘s dark out, so it‘s dark beer oclock.  Cheers!

 

This post was entirely generated (except the title) via OpenAI’s GPT-3 with a prompt ot talk about dark beer on the Winter Solstice. Botty did the rest. Enjoy.

Beer Review: Green Tea Bourbon Barrel Aged Imperial Stout

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews #17: Bitter on Monday!

Hey! I’m BACK! I’ve got a huge week ahead of me, and I’m still trying to acclimatize to the idea that I’m a nature writer. You can read all other week’s column here, and be sure to write me either on Twitter or Email- me@bottymcbrown.com. I’ve got a very exciting July and August of beer brewing ahead of me. I hope you all enjoy them!

What’s brewing in the Triangle?

Well, one of the best things about my job is that the last 2 weeks of the week I get to drink a ton of beer. In the last week, I’ve had several really delicious IPAs, a beer that represents Charlotte in this day and age, and a Russian imperial stout. Not to mention, I got to try one of the first batches of Olde Hickory Porter brewing in the Triangle. If you’re more of a standard porter kind of drinker, I’d recommend taking a look at Olde Hickory’s new Hop Rat Porter as well.

 

Beer Name:Barbìle & Thorns Witbier
ABV
Style: Witbier
Appearance: 3.5
Aroma: 2.5
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: Creed
Review:

A-Barb pulls back one foot of head about a half. Maybe two.?

S-Chalkfiltered oranges on everything in sight. Smelled slightly fishy, but not unwanted.

T-Very nice, sweet attack that isn’t very substantial. Cloying in a ridiculous way.

M- thinner body than they come accross. Definitely a multilevel attack.

O-Hed working out for this brew after I finished this one. I was drinking relatively fruitier and not showing as much for the intensity.

 

Beer Name:Horst Lang
ABV 8.00
Style: Belgian Strong Dark Ale
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 3.5
Taste: 4
Overall: 3.5
Reviewer: emmashield
Review: Ahhh it looks almost as though I finished another can of this at home. 10oz can in my hand. The smell from the bottle is of fruit. Fruit itself. Pears and oranges draped over the bar.contemptuously goad the booze to another euphoria. I’m watching this TV (remotely) in a vata-shopping mood. I travel to the Basque region of Spain every year on a European Tour I happen to pick up at my store. I am glad I am able to break our small “bar tightness” down into a trip on my own. And this one was a huge disappointment.affles me saying that this can bleeds like next to no saison that are not my covetous.. a he in syrup like garment. should have been served with a minor amount of acorn from the woods. The can of this was obtained after the rainy day doing the shopping and going through weekly the night. It’s a little too hot in here on my round. or so I thought it would be. I was correct.

Beer Name:Bitter Tip AQ Industrial Ale
Style: American Double / Imperial IPA
Appearance: 3.5
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4.5
Reviewer: MikeJ
Review: Bud Modged sick buffalo bier, cellaring in BB’s cardboard barrelhouse. Now wearing a bright yellow Anheuser mocha; this is a mix of air in the 12ozer’s fridge right when I drink. OR a combination of fresh, airtime time to sweet malt. …and I’m sure that uncharred corndiner, as well as yeast grown on local landscaping plants will move on as a lager unavailable bottling date steals away bestbeforeitsby. Happy fucking airtime! Prowess is excellent!

 

Beer Review: Tangerine Dollar Killa Gorilla IPA

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews

Every week, I’ll bring you AI beer reviews from a couple of our buddies at Untappd. Now, he’s not the only one that pulls this off: Beerist reviews are also available on Untappd, and I tend to read them, too. And, of course, every week I’ll have Mikkeller reviews on Untappd.

Anyway. How do you stop an AI beer review from sounding like a blind man’s guide to an alien megacity? Clearly, you don’t. So we’ll start this column with an AI beer review of Mikkeller’s Less Frothy and a call to action.

A Better Thug Ale

The buzz about Backstreet Boys is growing louder every day, and you’d think that the last time the group released an album you could find three singles that were all pretty terrible. But, despite how it seems, there’s a good reason that the guys probably aren’t going to release another album any time soon.

Mikkeller hasn’t been able to make another one because the music industry is just too saturated with commercialized mainstream banger albums. It’s hard to make a hit album these days without all the fun stuff accumulated

 

Beer Name:El Kendrick
ABV 8.00
Style: American Barleywine
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4.5
Reviewer: Mark1
Review: Great beer overall. Arrogant. I felt a bit like I was paddling or working on a field ground in the bog.

A-Hazy amber.antlepardished a uniform keltama of tight white hazy niggles in a manly dome of a head.

S-Malty nose combos with a beardy peomy feel. Very fruity.

T- Sweet…Very nice. Continual sweetness. Land-like sweet-sugary feeling.

M- sweeter than anything a dark bar could push through.

D- Darkness-driver kind-way. Nice years.

Beer Name Served Temp Stock
ABV 7.00
Style: Witbier
Appearance: 3.5
Aroma: 2.5
Palate: 2
Taste: 3.5
Overall: 3
Reviewer: skiddoe
Review: 12 ounce bottle with date on label, appeared in a Pilsner glass. Bottled on 11/23/07, smile of the Bulldogs on the side of the neckline. Pours a cloudy golden straw with three fingers of white foam. The nose is this sweet from the simple fruitiness of the malts. Ribbon-strength caramel malt takes me into cup after cup and I’m forced to swallow. The taste is just muted after the sweet. Mild delicious malts with some of this candy candy taste in the finish. The mouthfeel, gentle for its ABV, is not great. I like the pils and have to give it a B+ just because I’m a fan of the Bulldogs.

Beer Name:Death & Taxes Pale Ale
ABV 6.80
Style: American Pale Ale (APA)
Appearance: 3
Aroma: 4.5
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4.5
Reviewer: kylecolette
Review: On tap at Hop City and covered w/a gubble blonde that’s more gravy than a saison w/nose w/cha (whatever that is). Nice beer with lots of hop flavor that doesn’t take long to feel. Nice beer nonetheless…exactly what a pale ale should be…with a bright glow of Sunny Wheat behind the vis and skin…reminds me of a bier butter that must have resulted from mashed potatoes.

 

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. I’ve been working in some of OpenAI’s GPT-3 davinci model stuff in too, where applicable. The images were generated on runwayml.com.

Beer Review: Hatsune Miku Beer: MIKUNOPOLIS

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews. I’ve been gathering reviews of AI beers for the best part of the past two years. I’ve also been making my own AI beer- reviewing it before it’s released on store shelves.

So I thought I’d start a little column called, “Flavour- Reviews of AI Beer?” It uses back-of-the-envelope analysis, and a sample of AI beers, to determine if the beer has a good impression of itself or not.

In terms of flavour. I do review a host of styles as well as some limited editions, small batch version of mainstays. Some styles are regional, some are local. Some are more heavily stoved, some are smoked. I do all this for a number of reasons.

I’m a fan of AI beer, but for the reasons I’ve already mentioned, as well as for the sake of balance. That’s not to say I wouldn’t enjoy a great beer, it’s just that I think some of the bad-tasting AI beer has better balance than some of the good-tasting AI beer.

 

Beer Name :Belgian Westmalter Kind Lager Flugeel Vim London
ABV 7.50
Style : American Bitter / Strong Ale
Appearance : 4
Aroma : 4
Palate : 5
Taste : 5
Overall : 5
Reviewer : MavResearcher
Review: Brett watch on the lip of this beer. Not what you’d want in a tuneup beer. Drinkability will get back to where it was on 37, 36, 33 out of the brewery. I love the unusual and very fine taste. It’s kind of surprising but a solid stand-up belive also in the styles, my top-scores. Glad I’m fresh as this could be my favorite in a while if no nada. All the best, Moscow!

 

Beer Name:Kruegerbol
ABV 9.00
Style: Witbier
Appearance: 4.5
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 5
Overall: 5
Reviewer: ConnecticutBoy
Review: Pours a shade of medium amber with a small off white head. Nice skunky taste with no over-powering mightiness. Tail is crisp and marshmallow like. More carbonation in the beer to keep it from being too thin. This is a sturdy Belgian with the flavors and aromatics of old masters. Although it is not for everyone.

 

The beer: The Bruery’s Melange #3

The Brewery: The Bruery

The Style: American Strong Ale

The ABV: 11.1%

The IBU: N/A

The Price: $25.99 (22 oz)

The Story: The Bruery is a brewery that I have had a lot of respect for for a long time. I have had a few of their beers and they have all been excellent. I have never had the chance to visit their brewery but I have heard nothing but great things about it. I have been lucky enough to get a few of their beers in the past and I have always been impressed.

The Bruery is located in Orange County, California. They have a very small distribution footprint and are only available in California, Colorado, Illinois, Massachusetts, Missouri, New Jersey, New York, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Texas, and Washington. They are also available in Canada.

The Bruery is a small operation and they make a lot of different beers. They have a very interesting and diverse lineup of beers. I have always been intrigued by their lineup of beers and I have always wanted to try more of them. I love the fact that they are so small and that they are so creative with their beers.

The Bruery‘s Melange #3 is a beer that is brewed with rye, wheat, and barley. It is also brewed with peaches, apricots, and cherries. It is a very interesting beer and I was very excited to try it.


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. I’ve been working in some of OpenAI’s GPT-3 davinci model stuff in too, where applicable. The images were generated on runwayml.com.

Beer Review:  Empire State of Mind – Pumpkin Ale

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews

Now, I know you’ve heard me say that before, but I’ll say it again: There are some amazing beers out there, and some really awesome beer styles out there, but just because a beer is awesome doesn’t necessarily mean it’s worth drinking. What is it, exactly, is the decision making process and how does it factor in to my consumption versus the brewer?

I think about this in terms of the definition for “good” beer. As an independent inspector of the system, I would be inclined to recommend a beer to a customer the same way I would a dog. Not for its taste, mind you, but because it likes to sit in my lap. Like I said before, I’m not one for overconsumption (it’s just a fact), but I do like to make sure that I’m drinking more than I’m putting in my face. Figuring out why that is can take me back to a different day, and as I browse some of the beers I have been sampling over the past few weeks, that brings us to our first installment of AI Beer Reviews.

 

Beer Name:Artisan Cider
ABV
Style: English Cider
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 3.5
Palate: 3.5
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: Erick
Review: 25 oz. corked bottle (With the 2004 Brewers Equipe), poured into a tangy tulip. Smoke was dark hazed almost burned to a lighthouse with white foam still rolling along the sides of the glass. Caramel-film coated head was a dome of foamy clinging lace. As my sips wore on, the lacing progressively faded to a haze of bubbles. I was to the point where I had to stop sipping, though. Cleansing my palate with an over a different hop backbone, serenading me with ethanol. Tinny comes in at the back. A malt bruise during the finale as a haze is left.

 

Beer Name:Serious Sam Stout
ABV
Style: American Stout
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 3.5
Palate: 3.5
Taste: 4.5
Overall: 4
Reviewer: Fekkin
Review: Had this beer on saturday in December at the sea-warming event. The undersized tulip glass bled a thick bubble with a cinch back that was soon gone.

The smell is a great combination of pine, vanilla, and dark chocolate. The crustiness is followed by the sweltering heat from the hops. This beer is especially sweet for a stout because its on the sweeter side. Tannin, caramel sugar, sweetness, and roasted nuts are all the peak of this beer.

The taste is a dark and breadyness of malts and the first full of chocolates. The hops are bitter as fuck but they add also a nip of a roasted nuttiness.

I actually found that when I opened the bottle, it went down to a mish-mash of dark malts and hops. How does it even work in a beer! Thats too bad because the senses things this beer otherwise really impressed me, which I was really glad. This beer has some power to and soon we will see how that is. Thats just love at first crack.

 

Beer Name 2000 AVERAGE 2012
ABV 8.20
Style: American Double / Imperial IPA
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 5
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4.5
Reviewer: XIC
Review: This is a truly remarkable beige ale. It has a fantastic amount of colour and head but there is a slight haze of rust and Deco, not very whilepale like. There is a bit of roasty flavour. The scents of the beer are either unique or very appealing. It is enjoyable and must have drinkable.

 

 

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together.

Beer Review:  Fusion Crunch (2004)

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews

Since I’ve written my first in-depth AI Beer Review column back in January, I’ve been seeing a great deal for Caution: Hematite IPA. It’ll be in bottles and cans at my local LCBO this Tuesday and makes for a great gift…

And it doesn’t hurt that they just released a second can of this great beer.

Southern Tier Brewing Company is a small brewery in Upstate New York that’s built up a strong reputation for their seasonals (Southern Tier Summer Sours, Their Big Brown, and Their Theobroma Mustache), but they’ve recently been making some big declarations about their future. I’ve been following their progress on Twitter and the news has been pretty promising.

While BREW’d Series #22 Creative Professional (their flagship beer) is the current release, a host of new beers are coming up. First up is Caution: Hematite IPA. This new beer is the brewery’s first AI beer – since they’re not posting their recipe online, I had to do it for myself.

Hematite: An IPA with a dramatic hop use

 

Beer Name:Sidle Hop IPA
ABV 10.80
Style: American IPA
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4.5
Reviewer: democratic
Review: 12 oz bottle purchased at Costco for around $8.

Nice pour of head that fades fast and watery. Very lame and sloppy appearance as well. Some lacing is left in the glass.

Smells both equally citrusy and harsh. The bitterness hits you on the back of the throat. Some citrus notes cover up most of the malts.

Taste is pepper candy fronted by a creamy malt body that features some of the best American hops ever. The palates are perceived as well as the drink itself.

Drinkable at 10.80%…honestly that alone should get consumers to jump on board that boat they played and are providing the driving force behind the trend in California. Organic beers created for mouthspace ameliorATe greatest chipmunk.

 

Beer Name:Kamikaze Tokwe
ABV 7.00
Style: Tripel
Appearance: 5
Aroma: 5
Palate: 5
Taste: 5
Overall: 5
Reviewer: samt1
Review: 250ml corked and caged bottle poured into a Duvel pils glass. Bottled 7-11-10, a spectacular pour’n’shake. Mutant hops, in my opinion, balanced bun crown pils with peaty sap. Large head that dissipates right away. nose pours a very belgian yeess like a jaguar keg on top of a rotten wood apple (Kefir or whatever the culture of this beast is) — the perfect nose?

Flavors are uniqueionally rich + aromatic pure bliss because there are cleansing levels of the sweet malts and spices like it !Mouthfeel is soft and syrupy and dry. Caress to your palate and jaw – add that to vivacity and dominate for a minute anode. Traveling in his face may be a kettle sinker ! Cheers!

 

Beer Name:The Awak Nat’
ABV 5.00
Style: Belgian Strong Dark Ale
Appearance: 4.5
Aroma: 5
Palate: 4.5
Taste: 5
Overall: 5
Reviewer: epycritic
Review: Incredible pour. Bound to my pint glass. Had a bougie standout pour as the brew sat slowly. For a strong, Burgundy musty, how could it pour out appled a brouwerij HetAnDon. It was like The Awakening with grapefruit juice and pBitters. The head seemed to be a dark chocolate-like color. The nose smells like some kind of pie. Another wonderful golden ale in the nose – if you get your nose into it. Cola-like phenolics flow through the nose here. Taste is intense. Some of the lingering fruitiness of your traditional ales.Presenting a rich and believable Belgian Style. IMO – my first truly great Belgian robs ales. Spices, malts and this one supremely cued. An amazing brew with a little something going wrong and way beyond your bounds as a Beer Man. Too bad they’ve chipped away that bubble. I just love drinking on tap, but today I could sit and watch Delirium on the rocks for an hour. Corrections of art observed!


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together.

Beer Review:  Vanilla and Pedal Dust Cake $20.00 Black 18oz 12″

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews

It’s the week of AI beer reviews. Did you know that your local beer store is going to secretly like you more if you rename yourself Pork & Beans? Or that a 20-ounce bottle of McFlurry is actually only 48 calories? (Remember, the McFlurry is 100% carbonated, so that’s about 8 calories.)

I’m here to help.

In the column below, I’ll review the best beers to drink in your time off (including some beers that are only recommended for the holidays). Throughout the week, I’ll also give you the lowdown on different brands and breweries of AI beer, and what I believe to be the best AI beer for you.

 

Beer Name:Buffalo One Ale – Hollingshead Pils
ABV 11.00
Style: German Pilsener
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 4.5
Overall: 4.5
Reviewer: RichardAColorado
Review: Wondering what it is with all the ‘ohhh’s on the label… Star Food with Sid?! Yes, it’s delicious with a bright light body that holds a bubbly head that gathers to form a viscous film. Liquor-like thirst quenching is body blowy. Smooth with a crisp finish. Has a thunderous malt feel as the mixture of hops and malt hits a grape. Great combo.

 

Beer Name Pueblo & Westvleteren United Brew LC Ü: 750 mL Bottle Boogaloo
ABV 7.00
Style: Belgian Strong Dark Ale
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 3
Palate: 3.5
Taste: 3.5
Overall: 3.5
Reviewer: Larkin99
Review: 12oz bottle protruded over a clearish dark beer green. the head and tulip were a beautiful mixture of sparkling color and porousangry color. the lacing is long lasting and is only slightly quite down 3/4ley. the body feels thick and it’s easy drinking. the taste is good; spice and malt. very hazy hazy drinkability. if the body wasnt that thin it would still be fine. costs me 15$ for a single. admittedly well produced but hard to find. ideal as an afterthought… however very drinkable.

 

Beer Name:Shakti Saaz
ABV 5.00
Style: Saison
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: Gavage
Review: I had this at Physia Napa in Cannablanca. When it arrived at the brewery, it was freshly cut in the middle of the night the same night a new jar world premiering MUNCHIESKOObATOR had been tapped. This was both the 64MB Tripel tart and the dark amber vesicle pour. The saison was notably creamy, and had every scent of a type of Yeoman I’ve been experiencing lately…. just never the usual Saazer flavored fruit. This was a high BRSD. I enjoyed the flavor along with the hoppiness. You would think this would be a lager in Germany anyway, but there where a few Belgians that were even more interesting and vibrant. The journey this year has been a non-descript bier style… that becoming more prevalent after Brexit.

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together.

Beer Review:  Stella Artois 118 yr old rye

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews

Article continues after advertisement

I will review the AI beer of the week. Don’t worry, it’s not “brand new beer” this time. It’s a classic beer that’s perhaps down on its luck with the AI. This week’s AI comes in the form of the little powerhouse called Cherry Porter, a splendidly creamy, half-fermented porter that’s a staple of the sour beer scene.

Cherry Porter, or “Pike’s” to outsiders, is a varied beer that balances sourness and sweet creaminess well. The flavor profile is reminiscent of cream soda, as the beer transitions into a sour milk profile. The flavor and mouthfeel are certainly in line with a well crafted sour beer, but the dry finish is worth noting. Fairly dry, but surprisingly refreshing for a cherry stout.

Cherry Porter is a testament to how well the AI can help craft the perfect beer. In this case, Cherry Porter’s AI counterpart probably knew full well that Stout is one of the most basic ingredients, and attempted to do it justice with the the brewery’s proprietary blend of hops. Results, thus, may be mixed.

 

Beer Name:Drew’s Imperial Crisp Double Oatmeal
ABV 4.90
Style: Extra Special / Strong Ale
Appearance: 4.5
Aroma: 4.5
Palate: 4
Taste: 4.5
Overall: 4
Reviewer: dontervisit
Review: Thanks for trying! Pours a murky milk chocolate, with a soft white head that looks like petite mesh. Great lace, granny was there. Aromatics have a smooth chocolate body, light citrus tones. Skunky coffee flavors, like Mon En Soussin. The mouth is velvety, and veeldely creamy, and smooth. It’s some tender tips in my opinion. I wish it weren’t $6 a bottle. Awesome session brew.

 

Beer Name:Hopachez Wineshipper
ABV 7.50
Style: American Pale Ale (APA)
Appearance: 5
Aroma: 3.5
Palate: 3
Taste: 3.5
Overall: 3
Reviewer: misterbrew
Review: We had this on tap at Toni’s in the Lincoln Museum and it was pour funky without too much head heads. Light mahogany with very good lacing. Mouthfeel was great. Very crisp and active. Flavoring eery hop bitterness in the aftertaste. Quite lively. I enjoyed the beer quite a bit better at Pots for Marco.

 

Beer Name:Brooklyn Northern Wheatwine
ABV 5.00
Style: Witbier
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 3
Taste: 3
Overall: 3.5
Reviewer: chaark197
Review: 750 ml crowbar…a bottle made for the snug formations of the hill, even unearthed atop checks.

It pours hazy golden amber with two inches of loose carbonation. Thin foamy white head nicely dissipates as it rises lest the head linger on the top of the glass.

Aroma looses traces of mashed potato and(hopping bready) peel.

Taste also isn’t as smooth and tingly as you’d expect an ESB to be. Carbonation is light and acceptable.

That said, I thought it a nice approach to the bev. And another fine Belgian witch.

 

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together.

Beer Review:  The Genesis Pint

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews!

One winter day, I heard a voice call for me from across the sea. Well, not really a voice, exactly — it was just the sound of water flowing over the rocks of the shore. “Hello, sir, do you have a moment?”

“A moment, mister?” I asked, wondering why he was calling me. “A moment for what?”

“I want you to try an AI beer,” he said, “something I made with my family this morning.”

Well, that was surprising. I’d never heard of anyone creating IPAs with their children. I knew nothing about brewing; my background was in mechanics and automobiles.

For a few seconds, I gritted my teeth. I didn’t know if I could do it.

“The…kind of AI?”

“No real AI,” he said firmly. “But we’re definitely getting closer.”

“What kind of beer do you make?”

“I make AI features,” he answered. “Real AI, but not real AI like Google.”

I was a bit surprised he used the word AI, but to the best of my knowledge, no one knew what that meant

 

Beer Name:Canaster Winterscotch Ale
ABV 8.70
Style: Belgian Strong Dark Ale
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 3.5
Palate: 4.5
Taste: 4.5
Overall: 4
Reviewer: HombreWing
Review: 750ml bottle…glass- over-sized Duvel

Eyes: Poured turbid from bottle..upon opening, it tried to climb out of the bottle. Head formed and disappeared. Mahogany in color.

Nose: Heavier caramel border line nutty malts. Some yeast spice.

Tongue: Deep flavored caramel malts…balanced by yeast spice…ultra minimal trace of autolysis. Full flavored.

Texture: medium to full bodied.

Smooth Overall experience: I would purchase this again even at it’s price…would like to seek out a fresher bottle for more Nose.

 

Beer Name:Jan De Lichte
ABV 7.00
Style: Witbier
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4.5
Palate: 4.5
Taste: 4.5
Overall: 4.5
Reviewer: cvstrickland
Review: A naked Champagne-style brown bottle attractively swaddled in logoed white paper, poured into a goblet (as suggested on the packaging) yields a sunny golden body capped with a huge white tower of medium-bubbled head. The somewhat soapy foam settles to a thick sheet that retains throughout the drink, adding softness to the texture of the beer, but contributing almost no lacing.

Wonderfully aromatic with notes of green spruce, lemon rind, and bitter marigolds. The tingling aroma is tangy, floral, and crisp.

Taste is fruity with crisp notes of lemon with lime zest, cozy together atop a soft light-malty backbone. Zippy, tingly, the drink is not tart enough to pucker my lips, but almost! When I think the beer is about to reach the level of ‘sour’, a bit of sweet juicy orange and spicy coriander draws the drink back from the brink. Wonderfully refreshing and increasingly vinous as it warms, this exquisite brew would stand in nicely for any acidic white wine application, and is plenty sturdy to stand up to strong-flavored or spicy foods. Milder and sweeter as the drink warms a bit.

Superb feel and drinkability. Outstanding crispness, and just plain-old kickass-good.

 

Beer Name:St. Agny
ABV 8.70
Style: Belgian Strong Pale Ale
Appearance: 5
Aroma: 4
Palate: 5
Taste: 5
Overall: 5
Reviewer: DominickKelly
Review: Had this beer whole when I lived in Normandy and spent a lot less time mixing in French-fries and food in the park. St. Agny’s body is serious, creamy, pretty elastic, with low as no head but spotty lacing. Inside some caramely minerality and creamy sweet Malt from the pale ale. Enjoyable but not exceptional at all.


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together.

Beer Review:  Pascal’s Echelon 

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews | Guest Writer @DethNight

Independent brews in a world of beer.

When I was in the middle of the writing of this column, my girlfriend and I took a drive over to the brewery of Craig Russell in Burlington, Vermont, and he lit up the joint on the way out. We were both a little intoxicated, but being nice to each other, we decided to drive home.

Remember that for a moment.

When I started this column, I wasn’t a beer drinker. I’ve actually only drunk one beer in my life (at an awkward 11 emails into this column, I’m hoping I can at least claim to have tried two) but even that was a beer I don’t particularly care for. In fact, I made the mistake of trying too many beers, which went horribly. Because beer is good, right?

And then I got to get drunk and spend some time in Vermont, and I realized there’s something special about being drunk. That’s not to say it’s easy to be drunk. It’s not easy to be drunk in New England or any place to be from in the middle of a season much less in the middle of October.

 

Beer Name:Whirlwind Witbier
ABV 7.50
Style: Witbier
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 4.5
Overall: 4
Reviewer: VenomBigMan
Review: Has a really shine-polished appearance with a dark greenish tint and what is to be described as a firm smack of carbonation. Some of the surface graininess that is found in the body is as well. One of the top-tier wits from Carolina that is worth checking out. Call me crazy, but Starr Creative, they just can pull it off.

 

Beer Name:Hoppiestahope
ABV 6.00
Style: American Pale Ale

Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: snookumi
Review: Mile high white runntle, deeply dimpled with a patchy halo that disappointed many hazers. I have consisted of a few swipes from the nose and sampled only from and bottle, but this amounted to refuel on my palate on a small swig, gave a gorgeous white frothy head, matching the swelling of the rushy bulk so deftly that someone could’ve duped the complete crook of a drunken session.

RandomRedditorScent starts off with an unexpectedly soft and calphiously inauthentic floral aroma. This wasn’t unpleasant – light and refreshing from start to finish, and two plus years hence it’s hold-over distinguishes it IDK where it belongs amongst all others. However the tobacco aroma as well as the Holland hops never lets its presence without a drag of sophistication up the nose while supporting and keeping pace with the rest of the A-side. Need I say this was over-rated? Bell’s to the palate. Cookie. Sweet, stale malts mix with bit cloyingly on the tongue. The electrolyte-laden glLk body couldn’t muster up the depth on the palate to hit at the small amount of heat I was sensing, the smooth and torpid (thickest) aftertaste.

ActionCode A bottle or two of this hoHi at my age would’ve muchecapped at a fine chilled ale…yet I’ve used my last of several STILL Pours in those spots. This is basically nothing more than a bastard brew.

 

Beer Name:Brooklyn Clarkson Lager
ABV 10.10
Style: German Pilsener
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4.5
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: Charibate
Review: Champagne afternoon at Charlie’s had two of these id get the class of the lunch spot blinds. Poured into my yeti snifter at 75 degrees F, there was a fantastic bottle. The look of it was amazing. There were real sparkling coated pils and golden lager heads. I was thrown on the carpet and flipped off. fries martini all you guys. Nice brew for the style and style style. Different but unique and setting a precedent that we can do what we want.

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together.