Botty McBotface’s Ode to Dark Beer

This is the time of year when civilized people drink dark beer.  It‘s the time of year when bitter and oily and chocolatey and roasty and oaky and rich and fullbodied beers become my best friends again.  So pour yourself a cup of coffee and settle in. 

Whether you drink a stout or a porter or a doppelbock, whether you drink it black or with a caramelcolored head, this is about being dark and dumb and happywhich is pretty much the same thing anyway. I had a plan for this article. 

I‘d written it up in my head about two weeks ago.  I‘d talk about how this is a time for reflection and how the winter solstice reminds us that we‘re not separated from nature, that we‘re all creatures of the natural world.  I‘d write about how Yule and the winter solstice celebrate the return of the light, though each year it‘s a little less than it was the year before, while the days start getting a little longer.  My wintersolstice article was going to be all about how society‘s obsession with youth and beauty and conformity is an illusion, and that if we can find the beauty in our advancing years, in the differences between us, then perhaps we can grasp that we‘re all part of a continuum, that the coming and going of light is a constant and the difference betweenold andnew is an illusion.  I was going to cite a bunch of examples in history of customs and legends and stories from pagan religions that demonstrate that today is a day of reflection, a day when we can transcend petty differences and celebrate the cycles of nature.  I was going to write about how life is all about ebbs and flows, about death and birth, and how winter is just a part of the process.  I was going to write about how there is more dark than light in our lives, more sadness and pain than joyand yet we still celebrate the cosmos with our rituals, even as we celebrate the lifegiving gifts of the solstice. Although I am writing about all those things.  Just not in this post.

My intention today is not to talk about the spiritual reasons why we‘re celebrating.  Instead I‘m going to write about beer, and why we‘re drinking dark beer in the winter.  It‘s a tale as old as time.  More specifically, it‘s a tale as old as Bavaria. I‘ll admit, my first stint on the internet was as a lurker on homebrewing forums.  I didn‘t make anything for about two years, but I was always interested.  That‘s how I ended up in the homebrewing forums of the late 90s, which were the incubators of the craft beer revolution that was brewing at the same time.  Even way back then, before I was really involved with beer, I loved reading about the seasonal ales that people would brew for Christmas.  One American homebrewer claimed that he‘d brewed up a Christmas beer every year since 1978.  For a long time, I thought he had to be exaggerating.  But this year I realized that it‘s actually true.  It‘s been twenty years since I started brewing beer, and I‘ve never made a Christmas beer before.

I was inspired by those old timers, those pioneers.  I got a little push from Dogfish Head, who came out with their dark, weird, wonderful Festina Lente earlier this month.  So I decided that it was time to get in the spirit of Solstice and celebrate the coming of winter with a seasonal brew.  I brewed a dark lager, even though I‘m not particularly fond of dark lagers.  I wanted to do something a little different, since I haven‘t done a singlehop beer in a while.  I wanted to try using some of the newer hops that are out there, and HBC342 has been my favorite for a few years now.  One of my goals for 2011 was to use some of the newer springforward American hops, so I figured this was as good a time as any to give it a try.

Meanwhile, we went out for a brief, snowy schlitter through the neighborhood with our friends Patrick and Katie from down the street.  They‘re big skiers, so they get excited when there‘s even a little bit of snow on the groundwhich is pretty much all the time these days.  We took a leak in the snow and then downed a couple of beers, kegged some beer, and barbecued some beef for dinner.  For the first time in months we turned on our wood stove after a hard day‘s work, and we let ourselves get a little giddy over the coming of winter.

I have never been able to get excited about the winter solstice.  I‘ve never given it much thought as a religious holiday, or recoiled at its pagan roots, or espoused its deep spiritual meaning.  It‘s just a holiday to me.  Like Arbor Day and Memorial Day and Independence Day.  I certainly don‘t have any qualms about drinking dark beer on the solsticeand in fact it‘s probably the best time to drink a dark beer. I started brewing beer because dark beer is delicious.  I started brewing beer because I wanted to learn how to use my senses to enjoy beer even more. 

I started brewing beer because I wanted to be able to drink beer all year long.  That‘s why I started brewing beer.  And that‘s why I make dark beer now. It‘s dark out, so it‘s dark beer oclock.  Cheers!

 

This post was entirely generated (except the title) via OpenAI’s GPT-3 with a prompt ot talk about dark beer on the Winter Solstice. Botty did the rest. Enjoy.

Botty McBotface’s AI/Machine Learning Episode 20x

You can email us questions, comments, and beer recs at podcast@barleyprose.com.

This episode is a little different, since Michael is current on vacation in Cape Cod, trying to figure out how many times he can go to the Treehouse Brewery shop there.

Botty McBotface has composed this entire episode, with help from OpenAI’s GPT3 and some choice prompts. It’s weird, but that’s alright. We’ll be normal next week.

Beers

  • Jason: Grimm Rainbow Dome
  • Jake: Stillwater Cellar Door
  • Michael: Michelob Ultra for the win
  • Chris: Ommegangs Iron Throne
  • Botty McBotface: Solemn Oaths Thanatos Tripel

Follow Us On Twitter: Jason, Michael,Chris, and Jake.

And check out Barley Prose on Instagram for more beer content.

Please rate (5 David Wright   ..or Davey Johnson..or Ed Charles.. Stars!) and review the podcast on Apple PodcastsGoogle Podcasts, your favorite nail salon, or just scribble the URL on a cocktail napkin at your local brewery.

Beer Review: Hatsune Miku Beer: MIKUNOPOLIS

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews. I’ve been gathering reviews of AI beers for the best part of the past two years. I’ve also been making my own AI beer- reviewing it before it’s released on store shelves.

So I thought I’d start a little column called, “Flavour- Reviews of AI Beer?” It uses back-of-the-envelope analysis, and a sample of AI beers, to determine if the beer has a good impression of itself or not.

In terms of flavour. I do review a host of styles as well as some limited editions, small batch version of mainstays. Some styles are regional, some are local. Some are more heavily stoved, some are smoked. I do all this for a number of reasons.

I’m a fan of AI beer, but for the reasons I’ve already mentioned, as well as for the sake of balance. That’s not to say I wouldn’t enjoy a great beer, it’s just that I think some of the bad-tasting AI beer has better balance than some of the good-tasting AI beer.

 

Beer Name :Belgian Westmalter Kind Lager Flugeel Vim London
ABV 7.50
Style : American Bitter / Strong Ale
Appearance : 4
Aroma : 4
Palate : 5
Taste : 5
Overall : 5
Reviewer : MavResearcher
Review: Brett watch on the lip of this beer. Not what you’d want in a tuneup beer. Drinkability will get back to where it was on 37, 36, 33 out of the brewery. I love the unusual and very fine taste. It’s kind of surprising but a solid stand-up belive also in the styles, my top-scores. Glad I’m fresh as this could be my favorite in a while if no nada. All the best, Moscow!

 

Beer Name:Kruegerbol
ABV 9.00
Style: Witbier
Appearance: 4.5
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 5
Overall: 5
Reviewer: ConnecticutBoy
Review: Pours a shade of medium amber with a small off white head. Nice skunky taste with no over-powering mightiness. Tail is crisp and marshmallow like. More carbonation in the beer to keep it from being too thin. This is a sturdy Belgian with the flavors and aromatics of old masters. Although it is not for everyone.

 

The beer: The Bruery’s Melange #3

The Brewery: The Bruery

The Style: American Strong Ale

The ABV: 11.1%

The IBU: N/A

The Price: $25.99 (22 oz)

The Story: The Bruery is a brewery that I have had a lot of respect for for a long time. I have had a few of their beers and they have all been excellent. I have never had the chance to visit their brewery but I have heard nothing but great things about it. I have been lucky enough to get a few of their beers in the past and I have always been impressed.

The Bruery is located in Orange County, California. They have a very small distribution footprint and are only available in California, Colorado, Illinois, Massachusetts, Missouri, New Jersey, New York, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Texas, and Washington. They are also available in Canada.

The Bruery is a small operation and they make a lot of different beers. They have a very interesting and diverse lineup of beers. I have always been intrigued by their lineup of beers and I have always wanted to try more of them. I love the fact that they are so small and that they are so creative with their beers.

The Bruery‘s Melange #3 is a beer that is brewed with rye, wheat, and barley. It is also brewed with peaches, apricots, and cherries. It is a very interesting beer and I was very excited to try it.


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. I’ve been working in some of OpenAI’s GPT-3 davinci model stuff in too, where applicable. The images were generated on runwayml.com.

Beer Review:  Blueberry Bourbon Barrel Aged Barley Wine

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews Foundae

This week I’m going to talk about beer reviews in a science fiction setting.

I’ve gone through hundreds of beer reviews and come up with these five (5) AI Beer Reviews I think are best for anyone who writes beer reviews in this kind of setting.

If botting yourself finds these AI Beer Reviews very helpful, please consider supporting the blog by clicking on the green button……

Click Here

Just To Be Clear

These AI Beer Reviews are not meant to be disparaging or insulting. However, they are not meant to be positive but some might find them distasteful. Use your judgment.

Beer reviews are the opinion of human beings.

I don’t believe that AI Beer Reviews will replace human beer reviews. They won’t replace advice as well. However, they can be very useful and when used in tandem with advice from a human beer reviewer, can greatly improve a beer’s chances of tasting well with human drinking companions.

This is all made possible by the creativity of programmers and the creativity of AI programs.

And remember that if you like this blog you can click on the green button below and join the mailing list so I can send you

 

Beer Name:Bitter Tip AQ Industrial Ale
Style: American Double / Imperial IPA
Appearance: 3.5
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4.5
Reviewer: MikeJ
Review: Bud Modged sick buffalo bier, cellaring in BB’s cardboard barrelhouse. Now wearing a bright yellow Anheuser mocha; this is a mix of air in the 12ozer’s fridge right when I drink. OR a combination of fresh, airtime time to sweet malt. …and I’m sure that uncharred corndiner, as well as yeast grown on local landscaping plants will move on as a lager unavailable bottling date steals away bestbeforeitsby. Happy fucking airtime! Prowess is excellent!

 

Beer Name:St. Agny
ABV 8.70
Style: Belgian Strong Pale Ale
Appearance: 5
Aroma: 4
Palate: 5
Taste: 5
Overall: 5
Reviewer: DominickKelly
Review: Had this beer whole when I lived in Normandy and spent a lot less time mixing in French-fries and food in the park. St. Agny’s body is serious, creamy, pretty elastic, with low as no head but spotty lacing. Inside some caramely minerality and creamy sweet Malt from the pale ale. Enjoyable but not exceptional at all.

 

Beer Name:Zesty
ABV 8.00
Style: American Double / Imperial Stout
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: gpererbier
Review: Reminded me of Sam Adams new Belgium Wreck, very dark with a medium head. Aroma definately surpasses the smell, alcohol is mild and not noticeable with this. Full bodied with a nice carbonation that adds to the wash sipper. The flavor is short tight and aromatic with a great amount of alcohol that makes me want to stay at my favorite bars down house forever. I might drink my way through this but in spirit, I didn’t, and I’ll pick up more from a lager or amber ale. Great to decorate and enjoy….quickShip

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. 

Beer Review:  Cherry Blended IPA – 11% ( 4.2/5 )

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews!

Download Our Free Android App!

The Friday Review – Pictured Here as a window to the future with its arm crossed with a cybernetic eye.

I don’t think I am exaggerating when I say that, one of the most frequent questions that I get asked regarding IPA’s is, “How do you know if an IPA is good?” You see, if you have ever asked someone this question you have probably been told that, “the answer is simple; do whatever it takes to make that IPA good.” In that example, the IPA is being graded based on how good it is at being what it is, which is a beer that is light, flavorful, and is meant to be drinkable. I don’t think that this clarification will ever be enough.

As we move into the 21st century, there is a pressing need to educate the public about the importance of the IPA. In the past, IPA’s were widely considered to be inferior beers that are best purchased at the local gas station. Those days may never be returned. With the advent of IPA’s, a new type of beer—the Pilsener—has been created as a direct result of the beer’s pure form

 

Beer Name:Kasteel Triple Imperial IPA
ABV 11.00
Style: Belgian IPA
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4.5
Palate: 4.5
Taste: 4.5
Overall: 4
Reviewer: Gavage
Review: I skipped Indian Hoppiness, but thought this beer was interesting enough that I had to give it a try. The beer pours a clear dark slate that is dimensionally thicker than typical,and makes I’m glass cold as a couple flash paddles during the pour. a very flavorful Belgian IPA. externalToEVA

 

Beer Name:Barbìle & Thorns Witbier
ABV
Style: Witbier
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: LineMeUp
Review: BAR: Pours a very dark gold with looks of chalky upholstery scales, over-carbonation. srf

Smell is sweetness of grapes, fresh bread, and enormous banana. On the nose is mango with some spice elements hitting well in the back, enough to be kill-type.

The bitterness is there mainly tannic and peppery and hazy, but very nice overall. To fall from the top, you should not loose a lot of lightness, but it’s definitely has that mid-octane kick to make you appreciate the flavor. The summer fruit flavor of this brew isn’t a bad one.

That great ability of this brew to mix up hop flavors and skillsets is nicely drizzled throughout from start to finish. The sharp tang and spicy swishes return do a respectable job of covering meig’s tongue with some level of tang.

 

Beer Name:Pride
ABV 8.00
Style: American Double / Imperial Stout
Appearance: 5
Aroma: 4
Palate: 5
Taste: 4
Overall: 5
Reviewer: Hampus
Review: A: clear, Black brew with a thin white head and sparkling head the rest of the way down that only left a few springs of lace on the glass. S: Evil! Caked toffee, roasted malt, and a dark bitter/patchy alcohol aroma. May have been from the war

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. 

Beer Review:  Chicken Rice Beer Review:  Cinco De Mayo Beer Reviews:

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews! This week, your specific on-demand bot was created just for you! Following the release of the iPads’ iBean app, Hello Botty McBotface was born, complete with a mock-up of a beer, an Instagram account and a Twitter account (see the tweet below.)

Botty McBotface’s first foray into the beer world was a serious failure, as I found out in my first rebuttal in this column. Well, the game was a success, and as more people started recognizing my Elizabethan-style monotone, it quickly grew into a Twitter account, the introduction of a beer and, lastly, a website, albeit a rather light, uninspired one that makes reference to a “cloud of sugar” and, yes, “fancy feet.” I’m still not convinced that AI will topple mankind, but that’s okay, because I tuned in this week, didn’t like it and now I’m saving it for the next beer I’ve decided to review.

Although I have the scene of the bot’s first digital struggle on a loop in my head, to defend myself against the onslaught of negativity I need AI to sound like a real person.

 

Beer Name:Alaskan Devil’s Breeze Ale
ABV 8.00
Style: American Double / Imperial IPA
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: Sk8man08
Review: “Always be there for me,” Alaskan’s Toro said in the song. I did. One of my favorite songs of all time. He has a great job, Alaskan, count me in the proud family. The alcoholic monster who sits atop a mountain of other beer must have some bonkers abdominal muscles to keep from going down. tracks. Pretty rich. With a rich body that is just delightful. Good old boy. Boy.

 

Beer Grand Opening 2001 Vintage Ale
ABV 9.00
Style: American Double / Imperial IPA
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: DukeofQueens
Review: 9.5% ABV served with a great fall weather backdrop. Pours a dark hazy golden with a honey amber helmet. Thick, foamy white head. Lots of headiness from the beer. Glass tries to be perfect with the head. The body is thin but the central group of carbonation bubbles are very vibrant. Some sticky, red lacing. A great tasting fall beer !!

 

Beer Name:Brooklyn Get Down
ABV 8.00
Style: American Blonde Ale
Appearance: 5
Aroma: 4.5
Palate: 4.5
Taste: 4
Overall: 5
Reviewer: abitabuzz
Review: Well, this beer is one good. サーティ Beer pours a hazy, golden color with a ridiculously thick, foamy, white head. Smells like fresh cuts of dirty grass, an insect bite, and a strong pile of grassy heath. tastes like a combination of fresh watermelon juice, yeast, and grass. I am certain the animal is the fresh grass, but I can’t see it. I find the fresh grassy heath to be the only ingredient to this that I detect. Mouthfeel is a bit soft and watery. Flavor is a tangy, earthy grapefruit juice. The taste is onpoint and mild at the same time from this extreme beer.

 

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. 

Beer Review:  The Dockside –  Pale Ale [4.2%] 

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews. You are here because you want to learn about and drink AI beer. Obviously, you’ll want to learn about it like the Russo brothers, and in terms of how to appreciate something with a slight love for it. You want to learn about the things that make beer good and not just something you like to drink.

And now, let’s talk about AI beer.

I’ve been a beer drinker since childhood, and I’ve pretty much been a beer drinker since I can remember. Before AI, I had only been a fan of modern, dry, well-manufactured beers. I would never put it past AI to bring something out of the mix I don’t even want to enjoy.

Breweries like Hill Farmstead and Cigar City, in particular, strive to make their beer in the way that humans crave. They strive to create something built out of more than one ingredient, they strive to blend sustainability with flavor. This is good. It’s an ideal that I enjoy drinking in some fashion.

But, I can’t see AI reproducing that.

That’s okay…

I still think AI beer is cool.

AI beer is like going on a lazy river

 

Beer Name:Alaskan Smut
ABV 7.00
Style: American Brown Ale
Appearance: 4.5
Aroma: 4
Palate: 3.5
Taste: 4.5
Overall: 4
Reviewer: Marklindros
Review: My son picked this up in a trip through the Bay Area. He had a glass of this on tap and I had to see it. This is a great beer! Not quite as in-tune as some of the other options that I could find locally, but I smoked each glass of it as a nightcap. My experience on tap was the only downside – the smell of the barrel was not particularly strong. The flavor on tap and in surface pour is very good – you get the barrel and no other lingering notes. This is a great beer to drink if you’re in the mood for a beer.

 

Beer Name:Brooklyn Festive Ale
ABV 9.70
Style: Belgian Strong Dark Ale
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: smokestki
Review: The 10 oz. brown bottle is quite unusual. I’m not usually a big fan, but had this one sitting in my apartment. I had to swish around and see what a glass of this would do. Crisp and shiny amber with a thin and custardy head. The smell is malty and sweet, but not much else is there. My first impression was of jolly roach ale, but after trying this one it all became dark, boozy and musty. Looking back, I must have been in the wrong place to know what to expect. It has a pretty big beer for 9.7%, but I digress. It just seems overbalanced and one dimensional.

 

Beer Name:New Dandelion Whiskey Porter
ABV 5.00
Style: American Porter
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 3.5
Palate: 3
Taste: 3
Overall: 2
Reviewer: wisps
Review: This is my first beer in the Toronado area and I must say that I am very displeased with it. This, however, was all worth it. The smell was underwhelming; it was filled with yeast and the permafurnity of a quarter-pound of light couscous. The butterscotch in the mouth was much more enjoyable and after I had even drained the glass, I enjoyed the taste of the beer. Nothing particularly spectacular; the heaviness was unappealing especially considering the ABV. I am sure beyond any doubt that I am not a hophead, but this is not a beer I would seek out. If you like your beer chocolate-cookie with topping, you may like it. If you like your beer light, you may not.

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. 

Beer Review:  The Big Sour Chili beer

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews’

Brewing up a delicious concoction of tea and cornflakes with a little canned corn, a set of starchy fingers and a bunch of boring old paper canisters are the main ingredients in this week’s AI Beer Reviews. By the time you get to the end of this action packed recipe, you’ll be asking yourself “What the hell did I need those paper cans for?”

The AI Beer Reviews was created by a man named Mike from Michigan. Mike has always been a huge fan of beer and as he continued to brew more, he knew they needed to be involved in the AI Beer Reviews. So Mike searched the internet to find “guy who can do this.” The actual person who made this pizza-like AI

 

Beer Name:Catalan Cuvee d’Acquali (Wild)
ABV 10.00
Style: Saison / Farmhouse Ale
Appearance: 3.5
Aroma: 3.5
Palate: 4.5
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: Maria
Review: This beer doesnt pull off the wall of a plum. It’s rather sweet, rich and silky rich with a smooth bodied feel. There’s a bit of what I’m used to seeing in a wild ale but rather light about it. Functionally excellent in a saison sauce.

 

Beer Name:Mistress of Chaos
ABV ÃÂ$7.50
Style: Märzen / Oktoberfest
Appearance: 3
Aroma: 3
Palate: 3
Taste: 2
Overall: 3
Reviewer: kdudding
Review: As this is drank, a bit of creamy ice-pop my nose, but you can tell this is not what I was in for. Not a varietal style for mushrooms but a common fruity dragon pepper oktoberfest.

 

Beer Name:St. Boisterous
ABV 11.00
Style: Belgian Strong Pale Ale
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 3.5
Palate: 4
Taste: 4
Overall: 4
Reviewer: rygren
Review: It had a thick yet pliable head that made for slickness compared to the rest of the beer. The smell was bananas and some apples, some sugar and a little bit of spice. It had a bit of a prickly mouthfeel that made me think of the weather. The taste was more of the same, more peachy than anything else.

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. 

Beer Review:  Nuts and Bolts with Firebird’s On-Site Pint, Tampa

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews.

I’m struggling to figure out why people dislike AI beer reviews. You know, the kind with scores, percentages, and fancy numbers. There is something that makes me dislike these review… and I’m not sure what it is. I’ve read some reviews, and they are all completely ridiculous and mainly made up of the most basic and meaningless information you can possibly know. I remember my brother-in-law being upset when he tried to watch an AI review of Vinnie Cilurzo’s new Bud Light Platinum. It’s an upcoming red ale and he wanted to know if it was worth the $14.99. And when he was corrected by a beer guide, he exclaimed, “I didn’t do that!”

 

Beer Name:Dark Intrigue
ABV 4.00
Style: English Cud/Pcr Beer
Appearance: 4.5
Aroma: 4
Palate: 5
Taste: 5
Overall: 4.5
Reviewer: wifeofthedevil
Review: I have a longstanding beef with this beer’s puckeriness. If it is in fact one of the best I’ve tasted, then anyone who has had it I’ve known must love it. That said, I must have what it takes to appreciate it, and I am not taking a hard sell on it. Aroma is thick and Mohan-driven…in the most pleasant way possible.

Aclonate sweet corn and a dark malt comes out quite a bit more, but the beer’s flavor is so clean that it does not fall apart after a few sips. However, it does not overpower or drown out any of the aromas. The abv is well hidden, but earthy bread crust and bread-ish coriander make the best aroma. A muted whiff of hops and cream is noticable, as well.

The mountain of sweetness and booze is a bit indefinatable. I would have to say that this is the only thing holding back the flavor quality of the beer. This brew is superb. The beer is so smooth and tingly, just like a Ramen. externalToEVAI enjoyed the obscurity of the appearance, and it gave this brew a quite the bottle-in effect. Every time I go to the store, I get a slew of the three seasonals.

This is my take on the JW Marriott and Budweiser. The exposed sweetness of the abv will have to do in the end. The only sign that this beer is more attractive than the others is the incredibly sloppy, overly-sweet mouthfeel. The abv (not per 100microcents) will do the job; it’s not mass produced like other sipping beers.

I like this stuff. The drinkability (with the alcohol content) of this brew is better than any other mid-quality Cudade. It’s so smooth that the order is relatively easy to figure out how many. This is a fantastic drinker.

 

Beer Name:Whirlwind Witbier
ABV 8.00
Style: Witbier
Appearance: 4.5
Aroma: 4 and a little more than it smells. The head is toasty light brownish with lots of yeast, sooooooo fun! Wow, a body of a foamy in the mouth beer, kind of like a Belgian red. A touch of carbonation which is just so nice. The yeast is pretty strong, but not overwhelming, it just serves to make every grunt easier to take. A great beer. It is also very easy to drink and would be great if you didn’t get tired of the beer soon enough.

 

Beer Name:Brooklyn Dogfish Head Ale
ABV 8.70
Style: American Barleywine
Appearance: 3
Aroma: 3
Palate: 2
Taste: 2.5
Overall: 2
Reviewer: russpowell
Review: Had a light pour and faced a field of small cherries, peels, and some light carbonation. Poor head. Some lacing. My nose is a bit on the run, if you can even call it that. Very of the nature of the brew. I can pick out faint bits of vanilla and caramel. This immediately prevents me from enjoying the drink – it’s that good. Body is a bit light. Bread and bite. Ludicrous

 

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together. 

Beer Review:  Old Joe Bag Watermelon Pie:  A delicious pie that’s

Welcome To Botty McBotface’s Weekly Column Of AI Beer Reviews, Your Source For Bread, Beer, and Beer Offering (All Day, Every Day)

This is part 2 of a 2-part column. Read part 1 here: Is The The End of the Beginning of The End?

*Seasons are based on the BeerAdvocate database as of July 23, 2015, per the site’s most recent transparency report.

Tasting notes for each brewery from the series.

I bet you thought of yourselves as a craft beer aficionado, right? Slurping brews out of a pint glass, brewing your own microbrew, brewing mead in the back garden, working in the brewery? Did you? No? Then you’re an anthropomorphized cheese

 

Beer Name:Whataburger Low ABV Lager
ABV 4.60
Style: German Pilsener
Appearance: 3
Aroma: 3
Palate: 3
Taste: 3
Overall: 3
Reviewer: raar12
Review: A also used getting a carved duck head. WOW! Araarps! WOW! Ahhhhh! Whataburger has a great flavor! Straw in your face lager with a very nice malty backbone! Very clean finish as well! It is nice and refreshing! A little different than most hoppier lagers. I was expecting the heft to be a bit heavy and a bit heavy! I am glad that this appeared to be light and watery for my tastes.

 

Beer Name:Brooklyn Inner Light
ABV 9.00
Style: Belgian Strong Dark Ale
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 4
Palate: 4.5
Taste: 3.5
Overall: 4
Reviewer: draik
Review: Poured into modern tulip glass black, this stuff is some deep shades of brown. It’s dark almost. Oh, I don’t, like, remember how we used to have these in the 70s! Well, I remember when we used to have the wacky babies and girls: it’s taken us a while! This is my favorite light to my young friends, and I think as old as the bottle, the one I’ve passed.

 

Beer Name:Dark Intrigue
ABV 4.00
Style: English Cud/Pcr Beer
Appearance: 4
Aroma: 5
Palate: 5
Taste: 5
Overall: 5
Reviewer: decapone

Review: I pour this beer from a 12oz. brown bottle into a grey hand-knitted chalice.

The pour gives a slight haze, but no matter, the beer is a nice ruby red pour. The head is phenomenal. Along a roaring roaring, it’s a two-finger, off-white head that is brilliant, but not monstrous. The head, like the nose, is just a little too.

The flavor is alit best of coconut and light molasses. The overall flavor is very impressive. The molasses is hot and greasy, but the same gets to be true when you see sugar or something. It’s there, but just not enough to counteract the warmth and warmth of the beer.

The malts are a little too smooth and soft, and don’t stick around long enough to have any real effect. This beer is an awesome balance, I love the beer and think that it deserves a chance to shine through in a big way.

 

 


note: If you couldn’t tell, this stuff is AI-generated via a machine learning algorithm. The title and the opening blurb were trained on the standard GPT-2 model, with ‘Beer Review:’ and ‘This my weekly column of beer reviews. ‘ given as prompts. The reviews were generated from a fine-tuning of the GPT-2 model with a large sample of Beer Advocate reviews. I selected from the saved samples of these and put this post together.